How is it that just because I am sexual minority my understanding mother must be a “wonderful mother” to whom I “should be grateful”? I AM grateful to her not because she knows some queer theory and feminist thoughts which may make others believe that she’s studied for the sake of her son, but because she is and has always been smart, independent, supportive (financially and as a friend), and “taught me” feminism.
She was a feminist even before I was born. Her circumstances FORCED her to be one. And there’s a happy side and sad side to it. Indeed I am lucky, my fairly lucky circumstances are built upon my family’s history of marginalization. If someone tries to reduce her words, ideas, and activism to the love of a mother, that’s fucking degrading and disrespectful, and downright misogynous. Mothers, not because they’re mothers but because they are human beings with wisdom, knowledge, and their own experiences, are capable of various things, just like many others are.